Taking Care of the Inner Child

The child we were once continues to live inside us influencing every thought, every emotion, every movement and every action. Many of us in adult bodies still react like children, still attached to parents, never having broken free from the attitudes and beliefs acquired in youth. This inner child is part of our personality which is playful and spontaneous, having fun and craving to be cared and understood.

“The child is in me still and sometimes not so still.” 

~ Fred Rogers

Like a real child, the inner child is starved of love, warmth and understanding, is easily hurt and may become depressed and withdrawn. Psychologists say that the inner child is a permanent fixture and those who become hurt easily or depressed on an innocent remark are still preserving that inner child demonstrating the traits through their behaviour. Jiddu Krishnamurthy during one of his sermons narrated the story of two monks, one old and the other young. They reached a river bank at sunset and saw a young woman sitting helpless as the last boat had already left. She was frightened too because of the surrounding forest area where wild animals roamed about and came to the river to drink water. Realising her predicament, the elder monk volunteered to carry her across the river, the water being shallow.

After reaching the opposite bank, the Monk put her down and the two monks renewed their conversation while proceeding to the monastery. After a while, the young Monk told the older One: “You should not have carried that woman across the river as you have violated the rules of celibacy.” The elder Monk replied: “I put her down an hour ago but you are still carrying her in your thoughts.” 

We know that the past is dead but we carry it in our thoughts. Man can change only if the past is detached, forgotten or erased. There are some people who recall and relive their past days, expand the sorrow and make themselves miserable. I feel we can’t have a better tomorrow if we are thinking about yesterday all the time. There are some who breakaway from the routine and do something innovative and new, which is the inner child playing games with new ideas.

To enjoy a better life we must try to focus on our potential, not our limitations and concentrate on what we do well. We must exploit our natural abilities and aptitudes. 

“Everything seemed possible, when I looked through the eyes of a child. 
And every once in a while; I remember, 
I still have the chance to be that wild.” 

~Nikki Rowe

Hence, to be ourselves in a world trying to make us like everyone else we must liberate ourselves from any form of control. Let us focus at the inner drum, where the rhythm aligns with that of our heart. Just listen, the inner child, let it whisper in our ear and guide us through.

*Anamika Sen (Ani)*

We for our country........Our country for us!

My message for all those.....who always find loops in India...who always manage to point out the bad things of our country:

‎"Dusron me khamiyan dhundhna uss makkhi ke maanind hai......jo poore saaf badan ko chorkar sirf ghav par baithti hai"- Hazrat Ali (a.s.)

We don't dislike ourselves even after knoing how many flaws and faults WE HAVE.......then why should we dislike our country for its faults???? "We" the people make it good or bad....! I believe we must join together and contribute our bits to make our country bettr(if we want a change....that is!) than jz standing out n criticising it.....! I know our country has hundreds of negatives......but then we must not forget that it has thousands of positive things too....! Let us try to be the strength of our country and not its weakness.....*HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY TO ALL*..........JAI HIND! :)

As you dream so shall you Become

Hollywood actor Jim Carrey had a vision and a goal to be paid 10 million dollars for acting in a movie. He made out a cheque to himself for this amount and carried the cheque with him everywhere. He looked at it frequently and never stopped believing in his ability to earn that much money for a single movie.

Recognizing and believing in his talent, he did not remain idle. He worked intensely in his craft. He took every role he could possibly get and threw his heart into performing that role to the very best he could. He developed his ability to speak, to dramatize and entertain. He continuously stretched his performance to the breaking point. He took lessons and studied every aspect of professional acting he could have from the experts around him.

After years of hard work his dream finally came true. He received 10 million dollars for his role in the movie BATHAN FOREVER. By the age of 40, he was earning 20 million dollars per film. He acted only in two movies in a year. All this happened, because, he had a clear vision and dream and he never lost sight of it. He continued to work hard till his market value was 25 million dollars.

Anyone can become a professional in any area of his choice. I had a classmate who was poor in communication but she had the desire to become a speaker and an orator. She participated in debates and was a flop. But her determination and listening to oratory and through audios ultimately made her a much sought-after orator.

There is a one thousand percent formula which is based on the law of incremental improvement. This law says, “By the yard, it is hard….but inch by inch it is a cinch”. It may take an entire life to become a person we want. It takes hard work and determination to become someone different. We can’t make big changes in quantum leaps. It requires patience and discipline to become someone worthwhile and enduring. According to the law of concentration, whatever we dwell upon, grows in experience. Whatever we pay attention to, increases in our lives. Whatever we focus on, tend to perform better. What really happens is that when we concentrate on something, it expands.. the mind becomes positive, productive and creative. We become more motivated and more eager to try new things.

Orison Swett Marden, author, thinker and philosopher said, “The best thing about giving of ourselves, is that what we get is always better than what we give. The reaction is greater than the action”. All of us have potential and ability which are not used. The human brain can do wonderful things but if it is not used optimally, it withers and dies.

In his writings Peter Drucker, tells about a high school teacher who adviced his students to begin thinking of the legacy they wanted to leave when they passed out of the institution. He adviced them that it was the opportune time in teenage to begin thinking of leaving a legacy. Ten years later Drucker met some of the students of that particular class. Few of them took it seriously and had gained visible success in the careers. Those who ignored it, remained mediocre.

When we fail to use imagination, our life becomes routine. For example- A labourer who is engaged in digging goes on doing the same work for the same wages. Complacency kills our creative expansion of skills. In fact, imagination looks at each situation with fresh eyes and discovers possibilities unknown so far. My teacher used to say, “God has never put anyone in a place too small to grow and wherever we are, make that the best place to grow. Many of us spend our lives searching for success when it is usually so close that we can reach out to touch it. No one is better qualified to introduce what is to come than man himself. Everyone has the opportunity to make more of himself in his own environment with his own skills, with his own energy and with the tools and resources available”.

Greatness consists not in the holding of some future office. It consists of long great deeds with little means and accomplishment of vast purposes from the ordinary small private ranks of life. To become someone we must start now from wherever we are and not wait for the rainbow to arrive. Look at Pilots. When they crash, they go up again because if they did not, they know that they will never fly again. The same thing happens in our lives too. So, if we fail once, try again. Ultimately, success will come and it is a question of trial and hard work.

FAITH

“There is enough light for one who wants to see.”
It is said if you have faith as tiny as a grain of rye, you can move mountains. I strongly believe in this phrase. The other day, I read about an episode from the Bible. “A woman who was suffering from a disease for 12 years heard that Jesus was to pass from her village. She told herself if I get to touch his clothes even, I will be cured. There was a great rush and she somehow reached Jesus and weak that she was, fell but while falling reached out and touched his clothes. Instantly she felt herself cured. But the real thing happened now!
Jesus said who touched me?! His disciples said here a multitude is falling all over you holding you and touching you, and you say who touched me? Jesus said this touch was special. It was the touch of ‘Faith’. Others are sceptic in their touch.
“We asked him, now if we get what we asked for, it is fine, otherwise we can say we tried at least” but this touch was with full of faith. And to the woman he said, “daughter get up and go thy way. The faith has healed thee.” That’s the magic of faith. That turns stone into God. Someone has truly said, “Maano to bhagwan nahin to patthar.” Even God wants his children to have a strong ‘faith’ in him. He doesn’t expect anything more than this. Why are most people trapped by fears and worries? Because they lack Faith! A faith that can be destroyed by suffering is not faith. It is something someone believes to be true despite any evidence supporting that claim. It’s a positive mental attitude. It’s Life. In order to develop firm faith in the eternal truth, we have to cultivate noble qualities. This is our foremost duty. By doing so, our faith in God also increases. Faith is the first and foremost quality that man inherits by birth. He develops faith in his mother in the first instance. His mother may scold or beat him, yet his faith in his mother remains firm. That is the greatness of the love of a mother. Faith is a particular kind of belief. It’s strong. It is often unwavering and it does not require proof or evidence. Faith is a part of Life. We need faith for everything. From science to religion.
In love, faith is all about believing the other person despite the fact that you have no evidence to suggest that the other person is telling the truth. Without faith, doubt, paranoia, scepticism sets in, leading to destructive relationships. Faith is necessary for good relationship. Faith is to believe, believe in the truth no matter what comes in the way. No matter how many times someone shatters that trust. Faith is a gift from God. It enables us to know and love God and to put our trust in God. This God’s gift comes to us in many different ways. For many of us, it is channeled through people of faith, such as our parents or guardians. They build an environment of faith around us at home. They provide daily examples of how people of faith act toward one another and toward God. In the ordinary events of home life, we experience growth in faith……….our faith in God and our faith in one another. When something goes bad, God is the one to be blamed. When something feels right they forget that God is behind all things. I was no different until God showed me through life’s experience and opened my eyes to the fact that contentment comes when worry and fear are replaced with ‘faith’ in God. It is so true and I was so relieved to finally stop worrying about every little thing. So friends always remember, “Vishwaas rakh woh rehmat ki barkha barsa bhi dega, Jisne dard diya hai wahi dawa bhi dega”.

BE A GO GETTER!

Human life is reality. It naturally tends towards the most suitable and the most satisfactory feeling. It responds to things as they come. Its response is always right. A sensation is caused by perceiving and understanding an external object.
The knowledge possessed by man without deliberation and the ability possessed by him without having been acquired by learning is intuition. The intuitive faculty and intuitive knowledge are inherent qualities of the mind. The Bible gives us the parable of the woman who was suffering terribly for 12 years. She heard about Jesus and she came in the crowd behind him, touched his cloak and was healed. She did it because she had a feeling, “If I just touch His clothes, I will get well.” It was an intuitive reaction that proved to be immensely enlightening. Such strong feelings often urge us to transform them into action but most of us royally ignore them. Giving into intuition has always proved to be beneficial to those who have the sharpness of mind or the ability to make quick, accurate judgement of people or situations.
Accidents can be avoided and opportunities can be grabbed just by listening to this inner impulse. A lady once told me that she bought a 2 wheeler for herself inspite of being scared of driving. She felt that if so many women can drive with such ease, then she could also master it. Shez 50 now and last week she revealed that she was going for dance classes. She has been yearning to go for the nine-day long celebrations (dandiya) where the young and the old dance and enjoy the evenings. As it is the folk dance of Gujarat and she being Maharashtrian, decided to learn it first and went ahead to fulfill her long cherished desire.
The result, she said, was a great mental relaxation. It greatly surprised her as she had not expected it after a tiring day at work. Age and circumstances are never an impediment to a person who is a go getter.
The faith of the woman, who touched the cloak of Jesus, is really a great example for all the coming generations.
Jesus was always crowded by his disciples and others. Yet, the lady pushed herself into the thronging crowd and showed the courage to touch his cloak without any hesitation.
She never thought twice of being noticed by other people. Her faith was pure and it had the simplicity of an innocent child. She acted in accordance with her inner urge and was cured. Modern day living has robbed this simplicity from human life. A life that is just right does not consist in rigidly following one particular objective.
Listening to the voice within is not out of fashion yet. A keen observation into the lives of all the great ones would divulge this acumen in them and their success to a large extent was grounded on it. All those whose achievement mattered in this world were go getters. So, take care not to hamper the inward springs of life.

Blast Aftermath….

Everything’s so quiet, so eerie. Nobody’s stirring. Wait, I can hear someone moaning. I can see people around me moving a little bit. Hey, where am I? Why am I lying down on my back? Was I alone or was there someone with me? Last thing I remember, I was inside a train. But what’s this? This is not train! This has no roof at all! And where are the berths?
All I can see is a mess of twisted metal and equally twisted and grotesque people around me. I can’t make out why there is shattered glass and metal shards everywhere. The air is full of acrid smells of burning fabric and flesh. Oh God! I am having a terrible pain in the back of my head.
May be I should get up and see what has happened, I need something to hold to get up. My right hand! Where’s my right hand? I blink my eyes and stare again. There is absolutely no right hand. It’s impossible. It was there until some time ago, I swear! I do not feel the pain; I am numb out of shock. May I should look around for my hand. It must be lying somewhere here. May be I can get it stitched back. Stop! I shake my head. The loss of blood is making me dizzy. I can’t think clearly. I look myself and around me more closely now. I am drenched with blood, and so are the people surrounding me. It’s getting dark, and they are trying to find their way out in the dim light of the fire burning at the far end of the coach. They are equally dazed and shocked.
Nobody knows what has happened. An old man is crying out his wife’s name, but she isn’t replying. A young lady is searching for her lost child. Look at her! She has gone crazy. The child is there in her arms, lifeless. But she refuses to acknowledge the fact and keeps looking out for the child that was alive some moments ago.
I turn my head away. But the gory pictures follow me everywhere. Here’s a boy of 10, trying to extract his father’s body lying underneath a heap of twisted steel. He is pulling his dad’s leg with all his might, when suddenly the legs come out from the heap. But they have no body attached to them. The body is still lying buried deep down, the soul departed long ago. The boy gives out a blood-curdling scream and faints.
I force myself to drag ahead with the help of the remaining hand and legs shrouded by glass. Suddenly I stop once more to look at a body lying ahead. I think I know this woman. I try hard to remember where had I seen her. My head is reeling, and the memory is becoming foggy. Like the flash of a lightning, it strikes me that she is my wife. I married her only yesterday. Hey sweetheart, wake up! We are on the way to honeymoon! I shake her with my left hand. She must be quite tired after all the marriage ceremonies to sleep like that. Wake up, dear! We shall go out, and everything will be normal again. Nothing bad ever happens to us, right? My wife is not responding. Somebody wake her! I must get out, I tell myself. This coach is haunted. Whatever happened can’t be real. People can’t die in such a gruesome way. This is all a nightmare. I will just go out of this coach and it will all end. I start dragging myself towards the door. The door is coming nearer and nearer. My vision is getting blurred, my body is getting weaker. A burning sensation is clawing at my throat. I can’t think anymore. I must be….I……..I……

Don’t We All!

During my spare time, it is my favorite activity to search the web for inspiring stories. Many of the stories are not the work of fiction, but have seen the day as a result of heart rending experiences of the concerned individuals. Many a time these stories also act as an eye-opener. The other day one such story caught my attention.
One person was waiting for his wife to finish her shopping. He was tenderly wiping his big, shining sports car with a cloth. A man in ragged clothes came there and said, “Beautiful car!” The man was flattered. But at the same time, he also felt very superior to that other man. He kept on wiping his car. The person in the ragged clothes sat there on a stone watching the man and his car. The man with the car expected the other man to ask for alms. Nothing of the sort happened. After a while, the man with car asked the other one, “Do you need any help?” The man in the ragged clothes replied, “Don’t we all?!”
What an answer! Most of us think ourselves very superior by virtue of our birth, social standing, riches and many more such things. We also take pride in the fact that we do not seek help of anyone. People very proudly boast that they are self-made. Is it entirely true? Self-made or otherwise we all seek help continuously from someone or other. Our survival depends on so many factors beyond our control. Knowingly or unknowingly, we seek and get help from infinite number of animate objects. In my childhood I was told one story. A little boy is asked to run errands for his mother. He submits a bill for doing that work. His mother just smiles and gives him one chit of paper.
On that piece of paper, various items are written like, feeding the boy, washing his clothes, nursing him through illness and many more such duties performed by the mother. For all the items the fee charged is nothing and at the end, the mother had written- “repaid with love!” The problem of the modern era is translating everything in terms of material objects. Help is also looked from the angle of money. But, there is certain type of help which can never be translated into matter. We walk on a road. The road is the culmination of hard work and toil of many workers whose sweat got translated into a smooth and shining street. It is a truth that they got paid for that, but is the price of their sweat only a few bucks? What about the shadow we get under a tree? The tree is planted by someone who expected nothing in exchange of that gesture. Are we not seeking help from that tree to enjoy the cool and soothing atmosphere? Our ancestors had realized this aspect very well. That is why we have so many festivals which are a sort of thanksgiving to many beings in the nature. It is a different matter that we have modified these festivals to suit our lifestyles and forgotten the real meaning behind it. The festival of Holi is a typical example of this. The festival which was meant for eradicating the bad things, burning the useless items is in turn used for creation of many evil customs. The above stories made me think about many such things and then I realized one thing- The most needed help by a human being is that which makes him or her realize her inner self. The most important aspect in the whole process is realization of the help received by us. The biggest help in our lives, each breath breathed by the courtesy of the Almighty!!